Comic Relief


My 8 and 9 year old boys are total COMEDY.
Turner has Aspberger Syndrom and sees the world a bit differently.  Trevan is wise beyond his years - at times.
 They keep me in stitches - that's for sure!

Asperger syndrome, also known as Asperger's syndrome or Asperger disorder, is an autism spectrum disorder (ASD) that is characterized by significant difficulties in social interaction, alongside restricted and repetitive patterns of behavior and interests. It differs from other autism spectrum disorders by its relative preservation of linguistic and cognitive development

Turner is VERY Literal.  He is very loving.
He cracks me up!
Here is a little collection of "Turner-isms" and a few from Trevan.
There have been SO many - people said I should start 
writing them down - so here we go!

January 9th:   
Turner: "A kid in my class said Dad looks super old - like 50....I told him he is gonna turn 50 next month! Then I said how old is your dad? He said 26. I said well, if you are 10 and he is 26 looks like YOU were a teen pregnancy! He got mad and hit me in the stomach. Oh well. 
 It is the truth. The truth hurts." {OMGoodness}

January 7th:  Turner: 
"Life is like hair...you can leave it plain or you can style it! 

January 7th:  Tonight Taylor said "Turner - you really crack me up!" 
 Turner replied: "I know, right? Sometimes I crack myself up! 
 I am really kinda great!" {oh to have his attitude!}
 
January 6th:
While watching "The Biggest Loser" Turner decided he needed to be on a show called
"The Biggest FATTER" for those who need to gain weight... {LOL} 

January 6th:
Trevan: "Mom, can you take me and Turner to FUNKYTOWN?" 
Turner: "YOU can't go there - you are not very FUNKY!" 
Trevan: "YES! I AM!!" 
Turner: "Then do a funky dance and show me how funky you can be!" 
 Trevan: "Where IS Funkytown anyway? It MUST be fun because there is a song that says 
"Won't you take me to FUNKYTOWN!?" 

 BOTH: "Mooooom, where is it?" 
MOM: Hysterically laughing with coffee shooting outta my nose!!!!! 

January 6th:
Turner: "Are people from Japan called Jap-A-ean?" 
You know like people from Europe are European?" 
{LOL! Nooo son they are Japanese}  

December 28th '12: 
TURNER: "Life is like a sneeze. 
Sometimes it hurts and sometimes it tickles a little!" {LOL!}
 
 

{FROM 2011}
_______________________________
Turner: "Mom, can I feel your boobies?" 
 Me: "Um, well no, that is not appropriate." 
 Turner: "Oh man! I am 8 years old. I figured if I feel boobies now 
I will know what they feel like and will never have to feel 
them again as long as I live. 
 Me: "Well - the answer is still No." 
Turner: "Hummm Okay then can I touch 
your smooth armpit - at least I can get that outta the way!" 
 {see why this kid cracks me up?!}
_____________________________

Turner: "Mom one of my teachers says she  LOVES me soooo much."
 Me: "Oh that is so nice!" 
Turner: "Noooo, it is AWKWARD!  Like, she is NOT my Mom and she is too OLD  to be my Girlfriend, so??"  Me: "So, what?"  Turner: "So that is just weird.  You need to do something about it."  Me: "Like what?"  Turner: "Help me to not be so loveable."  {impossible son...impossible!}
 ___________________________________________


Trevan: "Mom, were you a Somebody- Pretty Girl or a 
Nobody- Ugly Girl when you were in High School?" 
Me: "Well..." 
Turner butts in: "Trev, it doesn't matter what people think you are.
 It only matters what God thinks you are and 
 we all know God Created us so, the answer is 
Somebody Pretty...The End."
 {He's gonna be SOMEBODY that's for sure!}
__________________________________________

Turner: "Today was PERFECT!" 
 Me: "Awesome! What made it so perfect?" 
Turner: "Well...it is the LAST DAY! We get a FOUR day WEEKEND, Duh!..."Oh, and I got a CUPCAKE! 
Nothing more PERFECT than a CUPCAKE!" {grins}
 ___________________________
Turner: "How long has Valentine's Day been going on?" 
Me: "Well, for a VERY long time I suppose." 
Turner: "Hummm, then why have I never seen Dad give you Flowers and Chocolate BEFORE now? He must really want something!" {rolling on the floor...laughing!} #StaceHeHasYourNumber!
 _______________________________

Turner: "Mom, I LOVE your smile! It makes me soooo happy!" 
{OhMyGoodness I love this boy!}
______________________________ 
Turner: "Mom, What's for dinner?"  Me: "Ravoli, Meatballs, Garlic Bread and Salad."  Turner: {Big Sigh} "Ummm, when are you gonna  get a cook book and make some GOOD food... like Cheese Pizza?  I think Amazon.com sells them!"
 {nice son...nice}
______________________________

Turner is SO Literal...last night he says:
 "My teacher sent me to the Library today to see if I could check out a book for the class."
 Me: "Oh, what did you get?" 
Turner: "Nothing."  Me: "WHY nothing??"  Turner: "Well she didn't SAY to check one out  she said to go SEE IF I COULD!"
 Me: "What happened when you went back and told 
her you could check something out?"  Turner: "She made a big sigh and  sent another kid to do it..."
 {oh, son!}
______________________________________


My Turner said to me today:  "Mom how can people take sides and not like someone? Like, if two people get in an argument and the third  person takes sides, doesn't he know there are  TWO sides to every story? Like HOW dumb is that to take one side when you  didn't get the other guys story!"  {so wise you are my child...}

No comments:

Post a Comment